In the beginning, JD adamantly only wanted two children. I thought that four would be perfect. Once we caught God's vision of putting orphans into families, our plan was multiplied by God. We are currently blessed with 12 children; five biological, six adopted and one more waiting in Ethiopia. Our first adoption was from the U.S., the next three were from Liberia, West Africa, and our last two were from Ethiopia. We are supporting our 12th child in Ethiopia after her adoption could not pass court.

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Faking It

Courtney just wrote a post on bloggers being real (http://www.storingupteasures.com/) and how it's easy to post a false "togetherness" that isn't reality. I try really hard to not present that we have it all together, because that is so, so, so not the case. I loathe the idea that people think we adopted because we were doing so well with our first four biological children that we were sure we should parent more. Our adopting has nothing to do with our parenting skills and everything to do with the fact that there are 143 million orphans that need families. When it's all said and I'm feeling very discouraged, I always come back to the reality that we are a better family than no family at all!

I'm thankful we don't have any HUGE problems, but we certainly have our share of "issues." I would love to blog on and on about my frustrations with a couple of my children that are in therapy (or need to be) but I don't feel that I can in fairness to them. Years from now, they will read these posts and I don't want extra therapy bills due to my blog! It's sometimes a tough call to post honestly and yet respect those in our lives that are are "victims" of blog-land.

What I can do is rat on myself. So, there are days, like today, that I took a shower, but never put on any make-up or brushed my hair. There are days that my kids sleep in their clothes. There are many times that my girls need hair attention for a full week before I get to it. I don't do kiddie-crafts, nor am I any good at teaching my girls to cook or sew. I really admire people who work home-ec into their homeschool, but I have a tough enough time getting my crew through the basics! I also really admire the organic Moms who feed their children perfectly and I'm trying to move in a more healthy direction, but I'm a long-shot from organic. When Elijah was born, I looked into the cute clothes diapers that the "cool" moms use, but I settled for my on-going habit of filling land-fills with mounds of Huggies. I am always impressed with the Moms that feed their family well on $350 a month, but I still spent over $1000; I really have never figured out how they do it. I'm known to say on an almost daily basis, "I'm on overload" and occasionally I do yell.

I could go on and on, but I'll conclude with a picture that says a thousand words - my school room on any given day, rest assured the rest of the house falls along the same lines.

On a humorous note, my husband read the kind words that my friend Steffany wrote about me when she gave me the bloggy award. It was something along the lines of balancing structure and still being fun. He chuckled and I jumped all over him, I mean nicely inquired to the reason he laughed; his reason was that he didn't think it's always well balanced. Great, one more thing to work on!

(For those of you bloggers who are contemplating writing a "real" post, such as this one, know the secret to controling my stress lies in chocolate hidden in my closet.)


  1. LOVE IT!!! Way to make the rest of bloggers feel like we don't have to "put on a front" in order to be endearing! I've always felt that "real life stuff" is much more relatable anyway. God bless your busy day! :-)

  2. Dk chocolate is a beautiful thing... a gift given to mommies of many for sure! lol!

  3. Jenny, you are the most real person I know. And for the record I have a peanut M&M stash that is for those moments when I just cant take it anymore! They seem to get me through. Obviously I have a lot of those moments...the size of my rear indicates that!

  4. I know a mom who wrote 'POISON' on the side of a container in her pantry to keep the kids out of her chocolate stash!!!!

  5. Thanks for being so honest. It's nice to know I'm not the only one who struggles or has children with issues. Sometimes I feel like I'm flailing about just barely staying afloat. I guess that's why I need Jesus to carry me. Thank you for your blog. I read it on a regular basis and find it encouraging.

  6. Thanks for sharing!! Love your blog that I just recently found! I'm a mama of 6.....4 bio and 2 little girls we've recently added to our family over the last few years through adoption! I've just started venturing into the land of "large family" blogs and loving them!!

  7. My stash is red licorice. Since I am trying to lose weight, though, I haven't replenished it from my last 'keep-it-together' moment. I was screaming inside today. :sigh: Thanks for keeping it real!!

  8. Thanks for sharing, it is encouraging to hear the real-ness in your life. Sometimes, I get down reading blogs about these seemingly perfect families while I struggle to get through the day. The Lord Jesus Christ must be our strength! Have a great day in the midst of the chaos!

  9. You have a flare for making "real" look incredibly wonderful:) I smiled, because so much of what you said fits into my own life. Too many times I get stuck into trying to make everything look perfect. I think part of it is because when I feel overwhelmed, I don't want anyone to say "I told you so..." Hmmm...you gave me much to think about this morning.

    I love catching up with you...great to see everyone looking so terrific:)


  10. Just found you over here after your switch from Xanga. We followed your family blog on Xanga (I'm "momzookeeper" from The Hoffman Zoo on Xanga). Glad to see you're still blogging and your family looks great! The kids are growing so fast! :)

    God Bless,

  11. I know what you mean about limiting the realness of life in your house because of the need to respect the other people invoved. My boys taught me that lesson long before blogging when they complained about me sharing mom stories. They did not appreciate my gossiping about them. It was an important lesson in controlling my tongue.

  12. I am stumbling from blog to blog while it is 4 pm...one kid sick at home on the couch, I am still in my pj's and robe...and all the others are due home shortly.
    I love what you said about not adopting because you are such a good parent, but because these kids need parents.
    We are searching and seeking.
    I would love to talk to you via email...kym_thurman@yahoo.com would you mind deleting my email address, though?
    I blog at stringbean17.blogspot.com